Confessions of a self-taught artist
Confessions of a self–taught artist.
I’ve got a stack of journals in my studio, and pages on pages of entries documenting my journey stepping into the art world. Of which most of the time I feel like a fish out of water, and the reason for writing this blog.
I didn’t grow up wanting to be an artist. In fact I grew up not really having any steer on what direction I wanted to go in. I went into nursing, because my sisters best friend was a nurse. My mum kindly encouraged me in that direction as she believed my calm and caring nature would be suited to the profession.
Luckily it worked out and I was a registered nurse for 15 years. However, I digress.
How as a wife, and mum of a teenager (and no longer nursing) am I now a self-taught artist?
Well this leads me onto my first confession.
I struggle to answer the question, what made you become an artist?
The truth is, I didn’t wake up one day and decide. It happened over time. Years probably. Which is why I struggle to navigate this question.
Looking back through my journals, it started around the time I hit 40. Or at least the seeds of creativity did.
Nothing made me become an artist, it was a gentle evolution. From writing a personal blog, to writing creatively for small businesses. and writing their blogs and email campaigns. I dabbled in some poetry, which became affirmation cards and prints. Adding to the cards, I started making bespoke and beautiful handmade designs, a few of which I painted in watercolours.
It was the watercolours that sparked something. I felt a strong intuitive nudge to focus on painting and put making cards to one side.
I signed up to an online course. It was an investment, and the best decision.
Life experiences and aspirations along the way have lead me to become an artist. Is that an answer? Maybe I’ll get better at answering this question, with more years of painting under my belt.
My second confession.
I don’t paint for anyone but myself (right now!)
I have an affirmation card on the windowsill of the studio that says “make time for the things that bring you joy and make you feel alive.”
This is why I paint.
The process of exploring and playing with paint brings me joy. Painting is something I do, just for me. It’s when I tune into my intuition the most and helps to bring my focus into being present.
Painting is like putting on noise cancelling earphones and stopping the clocks. Time stands still and the world goes quiet. I’ve tried meditation, I prefer painting.
I think I’m a much braver and curious person when I’m painting than I am in my everyday life.
I’m always asking myself ‘what if?’ What if I use this material, that brush, mix those colours, work large, focus in on the detail, paint over this, cut up that painting or use this tool? As a result, my artwork is the culmination of my curiosity and all my failures and learnings.
Painting what brings me joy, and making original pieces that I’ve loved creating available for others to buy and hang in their homes, is a joy too. That said I would like to offer commissions, and paint for others.
It’s in my nature to want to help people, and if I could find a way to blend that with my curious and playful explorations to create bespoke original art for customers, that would be special. I’ve yet to brave this offering. Yet it’s something I’m giving some serious thought too.
Finally, my last confession.
I didn’t anticipate the loneliness I would feel at times as an artist.
I’m comfortable in my own company and for the most part I love the solitude, quiet, and space I have to paint. It definitely helps as part of my process. Only, if I’m not proactive about getting out and about, or connecting with others, the reality is that I can become a bit stuck.
Feeling stuck, I admit I have felt lonely at times.
Arriving late to the art world, has at times felt like joining a new school when everyone’s already in their friendship groups. knows the timetable and where all the classrooms are. There’s a lot to navigate. I didn’t have art college friends or work colleagues from an art-related career to reach out to.
Joining the local open studios event, was a really positive experience. I discovered artists in the next village I never knew existed, along with many more across the town. It was the catalyst to me starting the local Artist Meet Ups. A reason to get out of the studio and forge connections with others who had chosen a creative path.
This year I’ve plans to schedule in many more meet ups, and connect more with other small business owners, both in person and remotely.
I recently signed up to a co-working session on zoom, and whilst I painted, others business owners were writing blogs, creating content etc. Stopping for a catch up and a tea break intermittently, it was lovely to have the company and support of others with me in the studio.
Getting out and connecting with other artists and other small businesses has definitely helped to combat the isolation, as well as showing up on social media to stay connected there too.
If you’ve been on a similar journey, or the experiences I’ve shared here resonate, I’d love to hear from you. Do get in touch.
I’m going to be sharing more about the artists meet ups in the next blog. If you’d like to know when this is posted, subscribe to my Studio Notes mailing list, where I share all the news first with my community.
Category: Artist Life